Lessons Learned

Sometimes you have to put yourself first. In order to help other people become their best selves, you must first be happy. One of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that you have to learn how to be happy by yourself. You can’t go through life counting on other people to make you happy. You won’t ever truly be happy that way. I hate to break this to you, but people aren’t perfect, and they’ll disappoint you. First and foremost in your life should be the Savior. If you keep your life centered on Him and the love He has for everyone, you’ll find yourself happier than you could ever imagine.

In the past few months I’ve found myself on the long and exciting road to happiness. I’ve been searching and praying and trying so hard to find it. I had an empty feeling in me, and a sadness that I couldn’t quite pinpoint. I knew that I should be happy, and I tried my best everyday to be happy, but it wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I realized what I was missing. I needed a more positive outlook on life, and I needed help to get it. I ended up doing the exact thing I should have done at the beginning of my journey; turn to my Father in Heaven. I prayed every day that He would help me to see things through a brighter lens and find “joy in the journey”.

It was amazing to me how instant my results were, as soon as I had asked my Heavenly Father for help with something specific, I noticed a huge change in my life. Nothing had really changed except for me. I still had the same life, the same problems, and the same trials, but I began to see everything as a blessing to me. I realized all of the wonderful lessons I had learned through my trials, and I began to see how much I had grown and evolved.

As I began to see my life in this cheery light, I couldn’t contain the love I have for my Heavenly Father. Where I’d once felt bitter and confused, I now felt happy and I understood why I had been put through certain things. My heart was so full I thought my chest was going to burst. I didn’t even know how to begin thanking Him for everything He’d done for me. I realized that even though at times I’d been in potentially dangerous situations, He had guided me out and kept me safe. Some trials I went through and came out knowing how to connect and empathize better with people than I could before. My heart was softened and I was able to see past all of the bad and the hurt I’d been through and truly be thankful for it. I even found myself able to let go of things that I’d been holding onto for so long.

I worked hard everyday to make sure I was praying and reading my scriptures and looking for the good instead of the bad. It was amazing to me what happened when I kept my life centered on Christ. I felt like the Grinch did the day his heart grew 3 sizes bigger than it used to be. I felt so much love for everyone around me and I could see them as beautiful, special children of God.

I am so thankful for all the bumps along my road, each one has shaped me into the person I am today. I know, now more than ever, that we are truly never alone. Our Heavenly Father and our Savior are with us every step of the way. They hold our hand and listen when we need it, and they intervene if they need to. They know us better than anyone, and they know what lessons we need to learn in order to live a happier life and bring more joy to people. I know that becoming a happy person might be hard, it hurts to grow, but the end result is so worth it. We are able to reach our potential and become a person we never imagined we could be. Take time to look around you and recognize all that God has provided you with, put on your happy glasses and see things in a more positive way. You won’t regret any of it, and someday you will be able to look back and say, “I did it. I really did it.” Life is too short too waste any second being anything but happy; drink in the small moments that define who you are, they are precious learning moments from above, don’t waste them.

A Positive View

In the past few days I began to realize something about myself. I have become a coward. I used to have big dreams and goals for my life. I wanted to travel places, and fall in love, and write a book, and live a life full of laughter and love. The past few days I discovered that I have slowly become a person who shies away from dreaming big and taking chances. I used to be fearless and full of hope, excited at the possibility of finding love and discovering who I truly am.

Somehow, I let fear creep into my life and slowly consume me. I find myself constantly trying to tell myself that I shouldn’t hope too much because then I will be disappointed if things don’t turn out the way I expected. I try to protect myself from sadness and failure. What a tragic way I’ve been living my life. I have missed out on so many wonderful opportunities. I let my insecurities and doubts get the best of me. I came to the realization tonight that I need to stop living that way. Life is meant for living. We are here to feel and experience things in their entirety. We should be hoping for things with all of our heart, and when they don’t work out, we shouldn’t pretend like we’re fine and its no big deal. Let those feelings out! Cry until you can’t anymore, let yourself feel the disappointment, then give yourself a good kick in the butt and get back on that darn horse. 

Think of a new dream, set a new goal and get to work on it. The beautiful thing about being human is that we have amazing brains that have this wonderful thing called an imagination. We were given those for a reason, to use them. We are able to create whole new worlds in our minds and dream big.

We were given the ability to hope for a reason. It gives us the opportunity to start again and believe in the best. We shouldn’t be afraid of hoping. Hope gives us a reason to smile every morning and every night as we go to sleep. There is hope on the horizon for a better, brand new tomorrow where anything is possible.

Explore the things that make you laugh and bring you joy. Be who you want to be, try to be your best self every single day. Get dressed up, put on some make up that makes your eyes pop, why the heck not? Show the world you’re ready for what it has to throw at you. Experience life and let it move you and change you. That’s why we’re here. Take advantage of that, and live everyday to the fullest.

^Whole Wide World-Mindy Gledhill

The Average Human

The average human isn’t perfect. We were made that way, we stumble, we fall, and we get back up. It’s a beautiful thing to be able to make mistakes. Even though most people will disagree, it really is. If we never made mistakes, how would we learn? We would all be a bunch of arrogant pricks running around with inflated egos. We’d probably never take the time to teach and learn from other people.

If you’re anything like me, you probably strive for perfection every single day. It’s a tiring job, trying to be perfect (It’s also irrational considering we never will be perfect). Yet we strive for it anyways.

Nobody likes to mess up and anybody who tells you otherwise, is a big fat liar. Nobody likes to be the one who screwed something up. It’s not a good feeling to know that you let someone down. But here’s the thing, we are too hard on ourselves. We live in a society where perfection is expected and nothing less. They expect you to have the perfect body, the perfect looks, the perfect job, and the perfect family. They basically have us striving for something that doesn’t exist. Life is messy; it’s never going to be perfect. No matter what you do, your kids will make a mess, and they will disappoint you, and they will mess up, but if you can see past all that, they will also bring you greater joy than you could have imagined. All those messy moments of childhood, the time they drew on the wall, or finger painted the table with pudding, will become memories of the good times. Those are the days of innocence and fun that you can never get back once they grow up.

In our pursuit of perfection, we don’t realize that we are often missing out on the moments that really count. Yes, it’s good to strive to be something better, but when you do that are you forgetting to take a moment and just breathe? Are you enjoying the curveballs that life throws your way? If you haven’t learned the great secret of life yet, I’m about to share it with you: LIFE NEVER TURNS OUT THE WAY YOU PLAN. Sure, your general idea might come true, marriage, kids, job, family, etc. But you might have it planned out to the T what you want in life, and I guarantee you, probably 10/10 times, those plans won’t come true.

The smart people learn to accept that, and they see that usually the parts they didn’t plan are the best parts of their lives. The not so smart people grumble and complain and talk about how nothing turned out the way they wanted, they choose to be unhappy and unaccepting. They’re being selfish, thinking only of themselves and the map they laid out for their life. People like that need to take a step back and look at what their life has really become. They need to appreciate the moments where they laughed so hard they couldn’t breathe, or the day they spent lying on the beach listening to the crash of waves and soaking in the warm sun on their skin. They need to remember that even though they didn’t plan on being a parent, they are, and those precious moments with their child are what they’ll remember in the later years. Not the long nights working overtime to get a big paycheck. They need to see the good instead of the bad.

Don’t live an empty life of fake perfection. Learn to accept the messy moments, learn to love and appreciate them. It’s in those moments that we have the chance to truly become who we want to be. We are able to learn from our mistakes and grow and become better. I’m not saying don’t strive to be better, because we should all have that ultimate goal, but we need to remember that it’s okay to mess up, it’s okay to fail so badly at something that you can’t imagine how to make it better. Don’t be so hard on yourself, remember to take a step back and give yourself a pat on the back for all the hard work you put in. When you’re up close it’s hard to see the progress you’ve made, but when you step back and look at the big picture, you will see that you actually are doing well. You’re doing better than you think, I promise. So don’t beat yourself up, learn to celebrate the small victories, because those are the ones that matter most.

^Human-Christina Perri